Thursday, May 30, 2013

Adrien: It's That Time. Swimsuits. Oh my God.

The apartment complex I moved into last fall has a swimming pool, which is so great. So great! And it opened this past weekend and...hey. Oh my God. I might actually have to buy another swimsuit because I will be wearing it more than my usual twice this summer.

Trying on swimsuits is right up there with trying on bras and cycling shorts - it's the quickest way to crush my ego into a little ball of weepy sadness. I know! It's especially bad if you accidentally try on cheap swimsuits meant for teenagers, not actual adult person shapes. The wooooorst. But, now is the time and there are a lot of cute options at a bunch of different price points. We'll start with bikinis because that's usually how I do.  Like this Mossimo bandeau top/bottom:

I love this print and I also love the adjustability of ties on the bottom. If you hate they way bikini bottoms cut in, look for ties on the side. Much more flattering.

I also like this Converse One Star bikini in theory but I'm not sure I'm sold on the string top. It just seems like an accident waiting to happen:

Such a great print though! Very Liberty of London.

This Mossimo halter top bikini seems like a perfectly reasonable bikini offering coverage without being too mumsy:

Boden always does well with swimwear meant for adult bodies. Some of them are a leetle bit too cover-y, but I love this ruched bikini top:

It comes in some fun prints too. This one is also adorable (and again with the paisley!):

And this one seems like a comfortable option but these boyshorts must be hella unflattering if this is the photo they chose:


This J. Crew bikini is basically perfect except for the price:

PRET-À-SURF® for J. Crew bikini 

Please note: Each PIECE is $150. That's a $300 bikini, you guys. You know what costs less than that? Getting bailed out of jail for skinny dipping.

Now, one piece suits. This J. Crew underwire tank is super cute :

I do love some stripes, especially on swimwear and this has some underwire support which I appreciate.

This Marc by Marc Jacobs Hayley maillot suit is the cutest thing EVER, though it's definitely more than I'd like to spend and I'm guessing the side cut-outs would make me look like a busted can of biscuits:

You can't go wrong with a super-classic black maillot suit. I mean, really:

Painfully expensive but very, very glamorous Veronica Brett maillot:

And HEY. Did you know that Natori made swimwear? I didn't and now I do and now I want this balconnet maillot:

So, those are my picks. It is way more fun to post swimsuits on the blog than it is to actually try them on in a cramped, badly lit dressing room. What do you like? Any suggestions?


  1. "like a busted can of biscuits"....SNORT!

  2. That Marc Jacobs model has zero breasts and I'm thinking that bathing suit would either a) make any wearer look like they have none or b) only be wearable for folks that don't. The black maillot - I have one almost exactly like this but with a long wrap skirt attached (think: sexy grandma!) which is how I roll these days. Got it at Burlington for $30. It makes me look like I have a decent figure. Best $30 I ever spent.

  3. Dude, I haven't had swimwear in the breadth of life of a person in primary school? Because I am landlocked and know no one with a pool. But I decided that I probably should get one, if I am going to be near a lake this summer, and beach vacationing in the winter - both of which I plan to do. Decided a super-cheap starter bikini was needed to understand how swimwear as an adult works. Old Navy, half off with an extra 10%. And now I am swimwear obsessed. BIKINI NATION 2013! Is all I'm saying.

  4. I also love that J Crew number - the matching rashguard is only $200!

    So I feel like there are suits for lounging and suits for swimming, and J crew is almost invariably the former. I really like Athleta for suits that actually hold their shape in the water. Also their Ruched Guard is very very good and offers full sun protection. As a So Cal resident with two children and a pool in my backyard, I have spent more time in the water than I care to talk about, and Athleta is worth the money for anyone who plans to actually get in the water, IMO.

    1. Oh yeah, I'm definitely a lounging/swanning about type pool person, not an actual swimmer. The Athleta suggestion is great! I always forget about that site.

  5. I love the one-shoulder swimsuit! I really want one, but I can't bring myself to have more than one suit since I do only wear it about twice a year. Mine is basic black similar to that DKNY one, so it works well enough.

  6. Oh dear. I turn into a comic Cathy when trying on bathing suits. Most one pieces make me look like a loaf of bread and a bikini is completely out of the question.

    Right now my suit of choice is a tank and a little skirt, not unlike your nana. I am searching for another two-piece that covers my mid-section.

  7. Love this post, especially the "splashing water" observation. So true.

    I'm partial to one pieces because I dislike my stomach region. Love the Natori and the DKNY. Although, halter one-pieces make me paranoid that my boobs will escape out the side door.

  8. I would love to find a two-piece suit that covers my lower tummy but is NOT a tankini (I have bunches of those and they don't really work because they aren't long enough on me). A solution is a high-waisted bikini, right? I've seen some cute ones on Pinterest, etc. Problem is that when I try searching for one to actually buy they are either a. ugly and not cute/trendy/modern, b. catalog only (of all things bathing suits must be tried on before purchase, right?), c. super expensive, or d. not available as separates. Has anyone seen a cute, affordable one in a store? Or is this as rare as an albino deer?

    1. Gail, that is indeed a rare albino deer! Hopefully someone will be able to make a recommendation.

    2. I bought a suit last year from Lands End that has a sort of high waisted bottom. It doesn't literally come all the way to my waist, but it has some kind of magic fabric that keeps my belly tucked in nicely. I have a c-section belly (if you don't know what that is, I hope you never do!) and it even keeps it under control.

      It's this one, though mine comes up higher on me than it does on the model in the pic.

    3. Thanks Marion--that's actually really cute! I would have assumed by the photo that it wouldn't come up high enough, but maybe it would? I don't have c-section belly but I do have twin you can imagine it's not pretty. Thanks for the tip!

  9. I have a black bikini similar to the purple halter one, and I will never need another one. The ties mean IT ALWAYS FITS; I've been 15 lbs lighter and 10 lbs heavier and it still fit me. MAGIC!

    And, even with a little bit of a belly, bikinis are more flattering than a suit on me (probably becuase my chest size demands the full support of a bikini top).

    All that said: I still hate being seen in it. I wish for the unconcerned body image of childhood.

  10. Every year, way before I'm ready, I start trying on bathing suits because it takes time to accept that you have to wear them, bleh....and you know what? The H&M ones are always the best for me. I buy a couple of bikinis from there every Spring, and rotate them all summer. They cost anywhere from 5 to 15 dollars a top or bottom. I always get string bikini bottoms because they're more flattering and comfortable, as you noted. This year I got a black one with a ruched, strapless top (with a silicone inner edge to keep it in place, brilliant) It's flattering, comfortable, sexy and secure, and no crazy tan lines. The bottoms are perfectly cute- and I've got booty, and a fair amount of surface in the back o'thigh area, and it tends to the dimply, dammit.
    I lay around and take in the sun, but when it comes time to swim/walk around I put on a pair of jams- I got a men's small pair(at H&M as well) a few years ago and they are striped and adorable. So voila! With my HappyJams I can gambol and cavort and ENJOY the pool/beach/ocean/impromptu games without feel utterly self-conscious.

    I kept on seeing these teenage girls in Germany (with athletic stork legs and concave stomachs and perfect bodies, I might add) wearing jams, and I thought "wait a second...why are THEY...but...HEY! That's it!!! I don't HAVE to walk around exposing myself all the time- but I can still swim and play!!".

    So there you have it: that's my summer solution. It's very liberating :)

  11. Hey Adrien (and others), have you tried Fables By Barrie? Some of them are a little too Katy Perry for me, but they have some cute suits, and they're made in the States.

  12. I nearly rolled out of my chair w/ the busted can of biscuits comment. Nice one.

  13. I love Title Nine's swimsuits. I'm more of the "OMG the beach runrunrun BODYSURFING" kind of person, so string bikinis are absolutely a no-go for me. I have their Impossible bikini top:

    I paired it with the Amnesty bottom, which I liked better:

    I got it a year and a half ago when you could get both in the little blue wave print, and it's still going strong despite some sandy wipeouts. I am very chesty, but it is very secure. I'm looking for a plain black one-piece, though, because sometimes I'm just not feeling bikini-riffic. And I'm about to move to upstate New York, where I suspect my tummy will appreciate a little extra coverage from chilly water, even in summer.

  14. The "busted can of biscuits" comment killed me. It's so perfect! I knew that what I was seeing in the fitting room mirror reminded me of something, I just couldn't place it....

    This one-piece from Anthro is amazing. It is not cheap.... but it is worth it. The pink version is on sale right now.