We Discuss: Call Me By Your Name

M: This was my latest Elio’s Mom purchase:

A: Oh, pretty!

M: I am trying to embrace my hips/ass. It’s hard

A: What to wear on top, tho

M: A tucked in blouse. Going full 80’s Mom.

A: Sweet

M: But an Italian/French 80’s Mom

A: I'm struggling with switching the silhouette

M: I know me too

M: But, it can be done

A: I love my boyfriend jeans! So freeing

M: I wore my challenging wife leg crop jeans

M: Wife leg

M: WIDE

M: Jesus

A: Wife leg!

A: Like mom jeans without kids

M: Hahaha yes!

M: Anyway I don’t think I have the right jacket. All my jackets are too long

A: Hmm, a jacket hole you say?

M: I know a shocking hole in my jacket wardrobe

A: You need a short jacket man

M: I know, I really do

M: But I need a SHORT jacket I’m bad at this

A: Yes, maybe a bomber?

M: Bombers aren’t usually good on me

M: I need something a little boxy or swingy

A: Gotcha

M: I need that damn mythical jacket

A: RIGHT

M: Fitted in the shoulder but skimming the hips

———

M: Still working on my 80’s Italian Mom look:

M: It’s a smidge tight on top but I think I just need snaps or hook and eye between the buttons

A: I like that on you!

M: I really like it. It's this one from Nordstrom:

A: So pretty! I love the neckline

M: I bet it’s taped down haha

M: Completing my Elio’s Mom look:

A: Ha, my mom, sister and I allllll had those sandals in the 80s

M: You still need to watch Call Me By Your Name so you understand

A: I know, I know! I will make that my goal on Sunday

M: I bought them last year and still love them. Target!

A: Are they leather?

A: No, I don’t think

A: Dang, they look like leather. Universal Thread has a pair kinda like them.

M: Oh they are very convincing and they are comfortable

A: ILU TARGET

M: 

———

A: Finally watching Call Me By Your Name...

M: Yes!!

A: I want this life, pls

M: Listen I know

M: It’s a problem

A: Visually it's fucking incredible and they've nailed the best of 80s fashion

M: I knooooow

A: THAT HOUSE

A: Let's go swimming in Italy

M: Yes okay

M: I literally just started the movie in the middle

M: You see that Annella is my spirit animal yes

A: Yes, of course!

A: I LOVE THEM SO MUCH

M: Sorry, I’ll let you watch!

A: It’s okay!  It's really something.

M: Let’s swim in Italy and smoke and wear shorts

A: OKAY

M: 🚬

M: Poor sweet Marzia

A: I know!

M: Am I your girl?

A: It's nearly over

A: The convo between Elio and his dad!

M: Oh dude

M: That messed me up for like days

A: 😭

A: New Wave Elio is great tho

M: Also this bandeau  and culottes moment is giving me life

A: Yes!!

M: So obsessed with her

A: This is the kind of movie that needs multiple viewings

A: I know I missed stuff

M: I have watched it too many times

M: And I still notice new things

M: It’s also just so pretty and the music is perfect

A: Yes, all that

A: I'm sad that it's over

A: We'll have to watch it together sometime

M: Yes please!

M: I obviously own it

M: Armie Hammer is not my type but I’d hit it

A: Nope and YEP

M: 

A: Haaaaaa

M: An accurate representation of how I feel RN

A: That gif is everything

M: Hahaha

Exciting Stuff.

The Nina Garcia post was pretty exciting stuff around here and just in case you've forgotten about our other little venture, we give you this tribute:

There's also this, which is not a tribute. At all:

But ha, right? Always. And it's not just us! We stumbled across this awesome post by Kim France* and it  made us love her more than we already do. Go read, We'll wait.

Heh, see? NOT JUST US. He's appalling. 

But, in finding it and commenting we got THIS amazing link-love! Meep! That was the best way to start a holiday weekend. Enjoy, y'all!

*Sassy magazine indirectly brought Marianne and I together. I am forever a fan. I was also a long-time subscriber to Lucky. Kim France is our girl.

Nina + Marianne + Kate + Adrien = 4-EVER

M: I am seriously doing deep breathing exercises.

A: OH MY GOOOOOOODDDD

M: ,$$$5/5skjao5eiwru0q93

A: What the HELLLLLLLL

A: G ittzirsitcoh pot

M: I cannot believe this shit.

A: WHATVIF SHE READS BLOG

M: @.8473{*5,$,"),83-28

A: BLOG Blllloogooooosooog

M: Haaaa. I was seriously being such a brat.

A: It was funny as shit!

M: In that, "respond to celebs even tho they don't read it" way.

A: David Bowie's son RT'ed me once. I think we're married now?

M: Right! And Nina just sent me a box of shoes!

M: I can call her Nina now.

A: Booooshit.

M: BFFs

A: Um, she and I are going to hang out with Lanphear.

M: Well, Michael Kors just gave me his yacht. I'm just like Beyonce!

A: Haaaa. I just lost the plot.

M: Me too. I am giddy. Giddy!

A: Best Twitter day ever.

M: Pretty awesome.

A: I think this menas you, me, Nina and Kate are totally BFF. Right?

M: Toooootally.

A: Our lives are going to change!

M: Haaaaaa

A: I'll bet they're reading the blog right now.

M: Oh for sure. Lets hope they aren't friend wtih the SHobbit.

A: Oh come on, everyone hates him. They must, right?

M: I can't live in a world where people like him.

A: Only idiots like him. And poor Garance.

M: That's just voodoo. I am googling "met the sartorialist nice" and finding nothing.

A: That's because EVERYONE HATES HIM.

M: Seriously, every interview says everything BUT that he's nice.

A: Loathsome little man.

M: Just awful.

Consider the Lobster.

(The following is a deep and meaningful text exchange we had regarding this.)

M: Wintour wore a lobster dress to the met gala. That is all.

A: What wahat?? Like, lobster PRINT?

M: Like, giant gold lobster dress

A: Ooh, I'll check it out

M: Brooke Shields has  jaunty cane

M: Carey Mulligan is amazing robotess

A: Oooh

M: Solange Knowles is kind of amazing?I don't know.

A: Yeah, she is freaky good.

M: Amy Poehler looks hungry and my phone wants "Poehler" to be "piglet"

M: Elizabeth Banks IS Effie Trinket now

A: Oh dear.

M: Ivanka Trump is Barbie

A: such a shame

M: Aw, Rashida Jones looks pretty.

A: I like her.

M: Rooney Mara is killing it

A: God, HER. AND HER PROXIMITY.

M: Pants!

M: OMG Mary Kate Olsen

M: Just

M: Whoa

A: MARY KATE. GIRL.

M: Right???

A: Jesus.

M: Scray

M: Very Daphne Guinness

M: Who the fuck is Anja Rubik and why can I see her vaj?

A: Coco Rocha WHAT?

M: Right?? Her hair is amazing, kind of.

A: CAREY MULLIGAN HOLY SHIT

M: Robotess!!! In the best way!

M: Nina Dobrev is kind of amazing for someone on the Vampire Diaries

A: Which I don't watch

M: God why NOT

A: Dude.

M: Shut up.

A: "Michael Kors looking very tan."

M: I snorted

M: Also, Vera Wang is the little girl from The Ring?

A: Emma Stone is just fucking adorable

M: It hurts my feelings

A: FLORENCE

M: Like a wondrous alien!

A: She really isn't of this earth.

M: Thank heavens

A: love

LanFEAR.

image: streetfsn.blogspot.com

A: THE BOOTS THE BOOTS THE BOOOOOOOOOOOTS

M: I love that it's clearly freezing and miserable and she's like WHAT.

A: The weather as we know it does not affect her.

M: Hats are for losers and don't get me STARTED on scarves. This pelt suits me fine.

A: That is a pelt of snarky blogger hair.

M: Meep!

A: BEST BEHAVE. You have extremely nice hair.

M: It's very warm.

A: I have been instructed to grow mine out.

M: Red is soooo de rigueur.

A: If Lanphear wants it, she must have it.

M: It's an honorable sacrifice.

A: I am scared of her. And also want to be her BFF real bad.

M: I can't picture her having...friends. In the human sense of the word.

A: Minions? Followers? Brethren?

M: Minions seems apt.

A: Aw, I don't know. I see this and think she might be fun:

image: http://fearlanphear.blogspot.com/

M: Downright warm and fuzzy.

A: Wait! Sorry, she still wants your hair. Snip snip:

image: http://fearlanphear.blogspot.com/

M: EEEEEEEEEEEEEE!

A: Betta run.

Wunderhipster.

Jenna's picks. 

M: Is there a word for Wanting To Be Jenna Lyons? Something German?

A: Smorgasprep?
 
M: Hipstergeist?

M: Listen, I just want those sunglasses, okay?

A: Oh, they're good. I'm liking the anchor bracelet a lot too.

M: It makes me long for summer. Remember when I had a tan and could wear neon? That was fun.

A: Oh, summer. I want to wear red cropped jeans and sandals and feel the sun on my skin. I am currently kind of greeny-yellow and sightless like one of those deep sea fish.

M: Do you have one of those little dangly glow lights coming out of your head?

A: Yeah...wanna see it? You...know...you...do...just...a...little...closer...

M: I'm skeered.

A: BUT YOU LIKE NEON.

M: Neon BAGS. Not creepy neon fish.


A: I love that. But, as a child of the 80's I am just not sure I can do it again.

M: Oh, hush. Yes you can. Picture it with your cute khaki trench. Wait, don't. Picture it with MY khaki trench and get your mitts off my bag, GOD.

A: I want to try it! You said I COULD.

M: I changed my mind.

A: You know what I do like? Neon toes. That was my favorite thing about last summer:

Source: Uploaded by user via Christa on Pinterest

Can I just see your bag just for a minute?

M: I am IGNORING you and back to daydreaming about actually showing my toes in public.

A: 




M: Why are you so bitey?

A: Because of this:


M: OOH

A: YOU ARE WELCOME.

M: Going on my birthday list. I wish it was neon yellow a tiny bit, though.

A: Um, Cambridge Satchel Company does make that in neon yellow.

M: Well, DONE. You know my address. May 12th.

A: I...wait. What?

M: Sooooo super sweet of you to get that for me!

A: No.

M: It's going to look so good with a tan.

A: Sigh.

Planet Lanphear has Calfskin Air.

A: WHINE.

A: WAH.

M: Why are you torturing yourself?

A: I can't stop! I just CAN'T STOP.

M: It is just cruel.

A: IT HURTS ME.

M: She is Not Of This World, Adrien.

A: GODDAMMIT.

M: Is she on a beach?! I am sorry, but that is the funniest fucking thing I have ever seen.

A: NO. It's some palace in Paris. But, I did not actually get invited to the Vitkor & Rolf show, so it's probably on the moon.

M: The moon is terribly sandy. Anna Wintour is looking into replacing it with calfskin.

A: Like you know everything? Anna Wintour will probably be successful.

M: It is already done, and it is fabulous.

A: Sooo... can Kate Lanphear be replaced with me? Can Wintour make that happen?

M: Oh, certainly. Just sacrifice Miley Cyrus in the light of a gibbous moon.

A: I'm on it.

OMG BE OUR FREEEEEENDZ

M: Forget Tim Riggins:

The Man Repeller is my Spirit Animal:

source: The Man Repeller

She maketh me want flares something awful. What?

A: She makes me want to be her best friend! I don't know about flares, but I think Man Repeller would be awesome to hang out with. She'd have me wearing harem pants in about half an hour.

M: I mean, I don't like flares really. And yet, I see them on her, and I want them. I want that whole damn outfit, especially the shoes.

But mostly I want to be her friend, yes. I want to drink Bad Idea cocktails and do each other's makeup and make fun of people.

A: I just want to try on all her crazy shoes. Like THESE:

source: The Man Repeller

"My little pony goes drag" might be the best description of anything ever. EVER.

M: For real. You'd be in harem pants and I'd be in a unitard and studded collar and we would be so HAPPY.

A: We would! I think it would be refreshing. And no man on earth would come anywhere near us, which I think is the point.

M: Can I talk about her hair without being creepy(er)? Because I've never colored my hair and I always thought ombre was a little hipster fashiony for me, but now I WANT.

A: It's not a look for mere mortals, Marianne.

M: I know, I'm always wanting to chop my hair like French Girls:

or go all crazy ombre, but Adrien, I live in Tennessee. Colored tights and mixing black and brown are edgy.

A: I think you could totally pull off that haircut! But ombre is best left to the professionals. I am kind of of relieved to live in a place where trends are slow to catch on and slow to die. It gives one's wardrobe longevity (especially if all one wears is breton stripes and animal print.)

M: If I cut my hair I'll do nothing but bitch about it for the year it takes to grow back out. I am a hopeless case.

And I mostly like that, but sometimes people give me the side-eye and I'm all MUSTARD TIGHTS ARE NOT WEIRD OMG. Ahem. Sorry about that.

A: Those people are stupid. And OH MY GOD DO NOT CUT YOUR HAIR. You will steal my "I hate my hair" thunder.

M: I am getting a haircut tomorrow, but it's guaranteed to look pretty much the same as ever.

A: Your hair is currently not Man-Repellant at all. But, you know, if pretty is what you're going for... it's a choice.

M: It is my cross to bear.

A: You are so brave.

Planet Lanphear.

A: I want to live in this magical land of super-high-end handbags and Kate Lanphear:

                                 photo: http://streetfsn.blogspot.com

M: Are you sure you don't already? Check under your desk.

A: I got all excited but there's nothing under my desk except dust and sadness.

M: Look under the pile of mail. I feel certain there is some Balenciaga under there.

A: NOTHING. JUST MORE PAPER. I'm pretty sure those bags aren't made of PAPER, MARIANNE.

M: Kate Lanphear totally has a fierce Celine paper bag that you'd cry over. Just saying.

A: There is so much blasé bag porn in that one photo that I'm surprised the camera didn't explode.

M: I'm more surprised that YOU didn't explode, frankly.

A: I almost did, but the Lanphear is just so collected, I didn't want to disappoint her.

M: She wouldn't even raise a perfectly manicured eyebrow, it's true.

A: She's very Busy and Important. Not to mention COOL. Argh.

A: I think the band Cake probably writes songs about her, but she doesn't care.

M: Seriously. Her hair is like the polar opposite of my hair. So sleek and perfect and I'll just be over here shaving my head.

A: I've considered it, but that is some advanced hair she's got. I mean, come on:

Who else would be able to rock this? Nobody, that's who.

M: I feel like you could do it, but it's a major Styling Commitment.

A: I think it's a tough look to pull off and I'm probably about ten years too old for it. Still.

M: How old is Lanphear, though? I'm not saying you should do it, but I don't think you are too old!

A: I don't know. 30? 40? 20? There's no saying.

M: The correct answer is: Time as we know it doesn't apply to her.

A: Ugh, see?  I cannot begin to play her games because I don't even know her rules.

M: I think she is from the same galaxy as Cate Blanchett.

A: I want to live there. Can we live there? BECAUSE I WANT TO. REAL BAD.

M: I just want to breathe the air. Okay, and maybe get one bag.

A: Does it rain Birkins there? Also, I don't think Lanphear wears any makeup at all. And she looks flawless.

M: Well now I just hate her.

A: HEY. YOU BETTER STEP OFF.

M: Smug bitch.

A: IMMA CUT YOU. HAIL ZENU.

M: So undignified.

A: Hey, you don't see me badmouthing your Giovanna, do you?

M: Fine. She's perfect with her perfect skin and perfect hair and GOD I'LL JUST BE OVER HERE WEEPING.

A: See? See what happens when you scoff?

Smited.

M: WAAAAAH.

photo: http://streetfsn.blogspot.com/

A: GOD. I don't understand what she's wearing BUT I WANT IT REAL BAD.

M: I mean what the fuck? Green...leather? Is it leather?

Those shoes.

A: I think it's a green...leather...trench? She's wearing a green leather trench. And making it look like awesome.

And those shoes? Make me want to break my face because I will never have them. Or the life they require.

M: I swear to god she's wearing some kind of breastplate. She is from another planet.

A: She is! I think my favorite thing about that photograph is all the normal floating around her like a muted background for her insanity. I think she is an alien. A glorious alien.

M: I need for our readers to understand that this is a Gio Positive Zone. I will not abide hatefulness.

How many virgins do you think I have to sacrifice to get my hair to look like hers?

A: Dude, your hair is already there. Many would have to die for mine to even come close.

I'm obsessed with the little metallic V notch on the pocket of her coat. I want that.

M: I keep looking at her shoes. And the jeans on the man behind her. I can't believe she isn't incinerating him with her eyes.

You can have the little v notch, I'll have the odd (perfect) snappy placket up by the collar. We can cling to these.

M: Look at her ring! She will kill you with that ring.

A: Oh, I dig the snappy placket too! I think that's what I love about enormously expensive clothing I can never hope to own - the details are just so PERFECT.  I can't even look at the shoes anymore because because because they...hurt my feelings by not being mine.

I keep expecting lasers to shoot from her eyes. Pew pew pew!

A: You know what she keeps in that tiny clutch? Souls of the unfashionable.

M: Bwahahahahaaa.

A: Don't laugh, dude. There is room in there for SCOFFERS too.

M: *meep*

Gamine Smackdown.

Adrien: Okay, can we talk about Carey Mulligan?

because I've decided I want to be her when I grow up.  Shut up.

Marianne: Oh, I think that's a completely reasonable goal. I know! You be her, and I'll be Michelle Williams. We can swan around being blonde and gamine together.

A: God, we are so freaking CUTE. Look how cute we are!

M: I know! Have you noticed how good I look in red lipstick? It's always perfectly applied, too. Man, we really rock the platinum bob, don't we?

A: We totally do. And, I'm really likable. Do you know that in my Vogue interview it was mentioned that my favorite movie is Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade? Could I be more ADORABLE. I DON'T THINK SO.

I have no idea why I'm dating Shia LeBeouf though. I think my agent is making me. He's such a douche.

A: Oh wait, we broke up! Phew. Close call, that one.

M: Your accent is so charming!

A: Isn't it just? So, how are things with Ryan Gosling? JUST ADMIT YOU'RE DATING.

M: *bats my mile long lashes demurely*

Carey, darling, I am a professional. We have a mutual respect for each other and I find him deeply talented.

In bed.

DEEPLY.

A: Hmm, I'm going to be filming a movie with him soon, so.

M: Just because we're friends, don't think that I won't cut you.

Can we talk about how good I look in this yellow dress? The other day I was swimming in my pool of hundred dollar bills and this dress popped into my head. Fabulous, aren't I?

 

A: Please don't hurt me!  That dress looks super on you! It's hard to pull off yellow.

M: Thank you. You know, dear, you look pretty cute in yellow, too. This dress would look awful on a commoner. Plus, adorable hair.

 

A: Oh thank you! Too kind. Those shoes hurt like a bitch, but worth it. ALL WORTH IT FOR GAMINE WORLD DOMINATION. I mean, what? Goodness. I must have a cough. *cough*

M: Even when you're plotting the downfall of Western Civilization, you're precious. Your voice sounds like butterfly wings.

A: Oh, you are a delightful creature. We should combine forces.

M: I'm going to tell you a little secret...all of this crazy snow?

I did that!

A: I am scared now.

M: Wait until you see what I have planned for spring. Did you know that in some third world countries the translation for El Nino is Michelle Williams? MWA HA HAAA. Ahem. Excuse me, I don't know what that was.

A: I...am... going to go now?

M: Goodbye dear. Don't forget, while you're filming with my Ryan...

sleep with one eye open.

Kisses!

A: meep!

Fashion Crush: A Conversation.

I opened up my blog reader and was confronted with this image from the Sartorialist:


I immediately emailed it to Marianne and the following conversation ensued:

Adrien - Jesus H I love this: http://www.thesartorialist.com/photos/3910GioBack_3087Web.jpg

Marianne - Gah, yes. That damn Giovanna gets me every time. I basically want to BE her.

Adrien - I just want to fall OVER. It's all so perfect. I mean...I just...people just... own bags like that and just USE THEM ALL HANGING OPEN. I would be clutching it to my breast all shifty eyed and hissing at anyone who got too close. Maybe I need to blog this, huh.

Marianne - I think you might, yes. She's just so BLASE.

Adrien - I know! Its all too much.

Marianne - And then I look down at my sad, frumpy self and waaaaaaah. I want to be an Italian Fashion Giantess.

Adrien - You'd be awesome at it.

Marianne - I think so. I think we would both be really good at wearing expensive clothes and being fabulous.

Adrien - I think we'd EXCEL at wearing expensive clothes and being fabulous.

Marianne - WHY IS THE WORLD SO UNFAIR?

Adrien - I WANT A COOKIE.

Marianne - ME TOO. Dang.

The end.