Thursday, May 20, 2021

We Discuss: Shorts Are Hard.

M: I swear suddenly grown ass women with real bodies are recommending Abercrombie of all places. I NEED SHORTS HELP

A: I was literally just looking at shorts online

M: It’s madness out there

M: I had some in my cart at Gap and they are sold out now

A: I am leery of my usual go-to Old Navy because everything is super super duper extra high rise

M: Yeah

A: Not so great for the short-waisted

A: I don’t know if I can handle Abercrombie tho

M: I know

M: I feel like I need to do the shorts version of my denim shirt quest

A: I support this

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A: I went to try on shorts. It I did not go well. 

A: These are the Madewell relaxed shorts. They were comical:

M: They don’t look bad! But a little loose in the leg

A: Oh trust, they were not great on me.

M: 😬

A: The pic makes them look ok but they were SO WIDE

M: I think my issue is that to accommodate my ass/hips anything relaxed is going to be stupid wide on my legs. So looking for more of a Bermuda cut because those will be loose on my legs but not insane

A: Yeah, I like my Joe’s Bermuda length. I might try to find another pair.

A: Sadly I think I’m sized out of those 😫

M:  H&M?

M: mAbYe!!!??

M: How I feel:

M: I just don’t think I can get away with shredded tissue paper shorts any more

A: The H&M pair look good

M: Agree

M: I know this will only end in tears but also looking at these:

A: Oh no

M: I know

A: All these 100% cotton shorts tho

M: Yeah I mean, I do like a full cotton jean even though they are a challenge

M: In the meantime, my Camper sneakers arrived:

M: They are perfect

A: Those are SO cute! 

M: So lightweight. 

A: I love them on you. They come in red too! Want. 

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M: Verrrrry interested in these.

A: They’re men’s 😂

M: I was about to send that goddammit

M: WHY

A: Haaaa

A: Your curse: All good shorts are men's shorts

M: So rude

A: It is

A: The Internet is now serving me up a variety of men’s shorts

M: Just great

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M: Oh good, cotton blend 😒

A: I think I saw those at Nordstrom and they looked thick and heavy

M: Exactly

A: Maybe... these:

M: It's been so long since I tried any bottoms for J.Crew that I am scared.

A: Same, but they look promising?

M: I am curious though.

M: Every year, right on schedule, I wonder if what I really want is a pair of Patagonia baggies

A: I tried on a pair in medium and couldn't get them past my hips so I am mad at Patagonia

M: Reviews definitely say to size up if you have any hips and ass whatsoever

A: sigh

M: This is 100% my inner college kid wishing I was one of those sporty girls

A: My inner college kid just wants leather jackets and Doc Martens

M: Also fair. 

+++

M: Me: I don’t wear chinos. Also me: maybe I wear camo chinos?

A: Those are GOOD! And an actual adult inseam! 

M: Well I ordered them and a million other things because I am broken

A: Excellent

A: I want a full report 

M: Of course

A: I really want to order those J Crew shorts but I am waiting for a discount

M: I’m sure it will be soon

A: I just can’t fathom paying full price on J Crew

M: Hell no

12 comments:

  1. Have you tried Everlane denim shorts? I just got Everlane shorts in the mail and I love them. They have other fits but I got these: https://www.everlane.com/products/womens-denim-short-canyon?collection=womens-skirts-shorts

    They are 100% cotton, so proceed with caution. The model wearing them has the hem rolled twice, it can unroll (and seems to stay rolled well, which doesn't always happen?!) one roll was a good length for me, like 4 inches or something.

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    1. I quit Everlane after they fired half their staff last year for trying to unionize and blamed it on the pandemic (it was quite a story) but I do miss their t-shirts and I am afraid to check out the shorts because I'll want them too.

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  2. Hear me out, but Bass Pro Shop always has some good shorts! Their private label brand Natural Reflections is actually really nice and fits my post-quarantine size quite well.

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    1. I just...don't know if I can go this route but I will take a look. Thanks for the rec!

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  3. I like the J Crew shorts - I could roll them to get that 5" inseam. I just ordered two pairs from Nordstrom, so we'll see. Wit and Wisdom, and Kut from the Kloth. I appreciate that Nordstrom gives you the leg opening, so you can tell if they will flap or not.

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  4. Universal Standard released denim shorts, I'm eyeing them. They look good on the models and one is my model "twin" body type wise. I'm tempted by those.

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  5. I have the opposite problem with shorts - by the time they fit my thighs, they are too loose in the waist. And I'm super long waisted, so I love a high rise. Have not yet found the right pair of denim shorts for me and have been wearing a Gap "super high rise" pair from several years ago but would prefer something with a little stretch.

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    Replies
    1. Good shorts are SO HARD. I feel your pain.

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  6. There is for sure going to be a discount at JC soon- Memorial Day is coming

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