Monday, April 28, 2014

Birk Talk.

M: I want to talk about Birkenstocks but FIRST I want to talk about this because NO. TOO FAR NO.

what in the hell. 

A: I saw that and made an angry animal growing noise. TOO FAR.

M: I just REFUSE. Okay now I want to talk about Birks.

A: I think they're just fucking with us. Anyway, Birks. Go.

M: First I need to say that as someone with long, narrow, bony feet, Birkenstocks don't fit me and it makes me a little sad.

A: Um, not to cause problems, but they do come in narrow.

M: Oh I've tried! Not narrow enough. They are just Not For Me.

A: I actually own a pair of silver Gizehs that I like okay. The part between the toes is overly thick, though. That sounds dirty.

M: Gross.

A: I would wear these:

Birkenstock Catania

A: But the Arizona style everyone is cawing about? Nope.

M: Oh see, I disagree. I think that ONLY the Arizona or Gizeh is acceptable. Any other iterations look

A: I will never love the Arizona. It's the official shoe of dirty fake-hippie hacky-sack playing students.

M: Well I mean that's what they ARE. Fashion or no. I think the fashiony people are secretly terrified that they have to wear them.

A: Terrified? Or hopeful? I think they get cautiously excited any time something comfortable is briefly in fashion.

M: Hopeful, perhaps, but they are not exactly flattering.

A: Well... but we are talking about these people:

source: Trendy Crew

M: *blink blink*

A: They seem like they'd wear shower shoes with mink trimmed Hermes knee socks and be all, "...What?"




  1. I perpetually feel that the fashion industry is having a big laugh at us all.

  2. Birks are horrible. Just horrible, they are in such poor taste. (Arizona-style is what I'm talking about. I'm not familiar enough with the other styles you guys are mentioning.) The only people who should be wearing them are the actual hippies, but they really shouldn't even be wearing them either. The fact that they are having a moment makes me so mad- they are in such unbelievably poor taste, anyone who even considers them... I just don't know. It has to stop.

  3. As someone with ridiculously long and narrow feet - seriously, they look like alien feet - the Birkenstock Bali sandals work well for me, but I did have to get additional holes punched in the straps to narrow them even more. There aren't a lot of options out there for the narrow-footed, so even if some people don't approve (see above), you have to work with what you can.

  4. I definitely don't think Birks are in poor taste, they just are what they are, you know?

  5. I can't get behind anything I wore in the 90s (except leggings - I did come around to those eventually), so I'm with Adrien on this one. Also, it took me over ten tries to get the captcha right to post this. At that point, I kept trying because it was the principle of the thing.

    1. Hey! Thanks for your perseverance. I turned the captcha off for now because they are the worst.

  6. Sorry to be so extreme in my previous comment. Birkenstocks just make me ragey :(