image: The Sartorialist
M: Is this girl wearing...a diaper? Bloomers?
A: Um, nice legs, but whither thou pants?
M: Is it a romper? A bizarre gathered mini skirt? NEED MORE INFORMATION.
A: It seriously looks like a pioneer diaper cover.
M: Another one for the Sexy Sister Wife Lookbook.
A: What gets me is that it's the same person in all three photos, so clearly she OWNS clothing that actually covers her body. Maybe she leapt out of bed in her Lil Orphan Annie nightie because she had to get the shot?
M: Now I am distracted by how she is standing. It's just so...vulva-forward.
M: Tell me I'm wrong.
A: She's going to have to get lower than that if she's trying to get down to SHobbit level.
M: "Lower. A little lower. Just a bit more. Okay, just lay on the ground."
A: It's like a really sad game of limbo.
M: On like, the worst cruise ever.
A: Wait! Maybe she's wearing some kind of retro swimsuit? ...with loafers?
M: You say that like it's a reasonable alternative.
A: I'm just trying to make it make sense, Marianne. UP IS DOWN.
M: I don't know about you, but I can't wait to bust out a onesie this weekend. So chic!
A: I'm going to wear mine with open-toed booties.
M: Top things off with a chicken on a string and a miniature glass of wine, and you are an instant fashion legend.
A: Is that all it takes, really?
M: Oh wait, and a hat! Now you are ready. For what, I'm not sure.
M: I think institutionalization is more accurate, don't you?
A: Hold on, someone's at the door.