Wednesday, March 26, 2014

Blog Uncoupling.

M: http://www.buzzfeed.com/whitneyjefferson/gwyneth-paltrow-and-chris-martin-separate

A: Awww. That makes me a little sad.

M: I know. But of course she put it on Goop.


A: I have issues with that.

M: "Conscious uncoupling"

M: Unrelated, this Glamoflauge business might be legit.

A: Ew? On the first. Ohhh? On the second.

M: I mean, I just put some on my hand but you can't see the blue vein underneath. And I used a teeny bit.

M: This is my "not bad, eh?" face.


A: Your EYELASHES. Dang, girl.

A: Did I miss a serious opportunity in not announcing my divorce on the blog? Is that what people are doing these days?

M: I'm disappointed that you didn't hold a press conference. You could have worn something somber but fierce.

A: I just ask that you all give me my privacy during this difficult time. And send me concealer recs.

M: Which brings me back to Glamoflaugewhich you should buy immediately.

A: It's at...Walmart.

M: I ordered it from Amazon because I will pay more to not have to get in my car and drive to Walmart.

A: Walmart is like the machine from The Princess Bride. It sucks life-years out of me.

M: I mean it's a lot cheaper at Walmart but not worth the year off my life.

A: Exactly. I really want to give Benefit's Erase Paste another shot.

M: I also ordered some NYX concealer because it was like $4, but it's way too dark.

A: NYX is at Target now! I like the brow pencil thingy.

M: They make my current favorite eye primer, which thanks to you I now put UNDER my eye and wow, what a difference.

A: I told you to do that?

M: Didn't you? Am I giving you undue credit? Because it keeps the concealer on and reduces creasing.

A: That wasn't me, but I'm sure I've given you lots of amazing advice about other things.

A: Like, LOTS.

A: Hello?

7 comments:

  1. Glamoflauge is basically amazing. I second it!

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  2. I am totally going to have to try the primer under my eyes trick b/c these lines under my eyes are sucking the life out of me. It's either this or just stop looking in the mirror altogether.

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  3. 'it's a lot cheaper at Walmart but not worth the year off my life." THAT is pretty much my philosophy of all products.

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  4. totally unrelated to primer, but please tell me you've seen this!: http://www.slate.com/articles/life/low_concept/2014/03/gwyneth_paltrow_is_consciously_uncoupled_what_s_your_goop_ified_relationship.html

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  5. I feel the same way about Walmart.

    And putting concealer under my eyes scares me. I always think it emphasizes my wrinkles. Perhaps I need a cleanse?

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  6. Have you seen this video yet? https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U5BpqJhyTow Wayne basically advocates for applying several layers of product to prevent creasing.

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    Replies
    1. Nice, thank you! Makes me feel better about wearing two concealers at once...

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