Tuesday, October 14, 2014

Funhouse Mirror.


source: The Sartorialist
A: The SHobbit, regarding this photo: "A long pencil skirt is so flattering on a young lady with curves." Um. Okay.

L: By "young lady with curves," does he mean, "not a boy"?

A: I like her outfit and thinks she's cute but, yeah. No.

L: Me too! Love the outfit and wish that I had as few "curves" as this lithe little Euro does. Maybe things look curvier from way down there where he's shooting from?

A: AH! I think you nailed it. The bag might have confused him into thinking she had really curvy knees.

L: Total paralax effect!

A: Or else he's just a creep who thinks all women should look like mannequins. Maybe.

L: OK, seriously? Before looking for perfection in women, mayhaps the SHobbit should look deeply into a (non-funhouse) mirror?

A: He could just put it on the floor.

L: Or use an apple box.

A: Or two apple boxes.

L: He will *definitely* need Camilla to steady him.

A: CAMILLA. STEP LADDER.

L: STEADY, CAMILLA! STEADY!!

A: CAMILLA! HOW MANY YEARS OF BAD LUCK?

L: CAMILLA THERE WILL BE SO MANY YEARS!

A: NO YOU CAN'T HAVE A RAISE.

7 comments:

  1. Well you know her stomach isn't totally concave. That makes her curvy you know.

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  2. Her booty: all treble, no bass.

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  3. I'm guessing anyone over a size 00 is plus-sized to the Shobbit.

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  4. Think about it from his perspective. As he shobbits down the street, all of our butts are eye level for him. Even the littlest booty curve must be an enormous mountain to him. Poor Shobbit.

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  5. "An enormous mountain... Poor Shobbit." **snort** LOL!

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