Wednesday, January 8, 2014

Winter Detox or Winter Retox?

A: Have you read the Goop Winter Detox Mag? Here is what I've learned:

  1. Eating is bad for our immune system and makes us sick.
  2. If not eating makes you feel cold, simply wear more clothing. Or huddle by a fire.
  3. The recipe for the Peppermint Hot Chocolate makes me gag. 

M: Wear? Clothing? I don't get it. Also I am cold.

A: Marianne, you need to wear clothing to stay warm. Or go sit in your sauna, silly.

M: MINT FLAVORED LIQUID CHLOROPHYLL.


A: YUMMY.

M: Goodbye cruel world.

A: Clearly somebody needs a glass of room temperature lemon water.

M: That seems decadent.

A: Well, it's not full of spirulina powder or pink himalayan sea salt but the lemon makes it pretty over-the-top.

M: I'll drink it in my sauna (abandoned dog house).

A: I'm gonna go crazy with some chickpea water, er, soup.

M: I can't even joke about that.

A: That recipe needs it's own SAD lamp.

M: If eating chickpea water and calling it lunch is what it takes to be skinny I'll just be over here with a large glass of wine shaking my head.

A: Pour me one too.

5 comments:

  1. You guys are awesome. (My autocomplete randomly typed "steak". That detox nonsense made it hungry too.)

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    Replies
    1. Lol at this comment, and the detox is definitely nonsense.

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  2. I admit to kind of liking Gwyneth, despite all of her nonsense, BUT that chickpea soup recipe is just a bridge too far. The mere thought of it makes me gag.

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  3. Ok, I thought breakfast was the most important meal of the day but after my sip of lemon water and herbal tea, i feel ready to take on the day! Thanks Dr. Junger, Gwyneth and you guys for sharing the wonderful lightness and detoxification strategies.

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  4. Thought you were just joking about the chlorophyl! The chai gingerbread thing looks nearly yummy and if I won the lotto I would immediately buy you ladies and all readers a "Hush" chair.

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