Wednesday, July 11, 2018

We Discuss: Lasers, Mostly.



M: I have my armpit laser appointment at 4! I almost forgot

A: Ooh, exciting! I hope it’s not to painful.

M: I think it will be fine, I’m pretty tough

A: You are

M: Can’t be worse than a tattoo and that was okay I figure

A: No way is it worse than a tattoo

M: Well that hurt a shocking amount!

M: But it was fast

M: But like OW

A: Eep

M: It is still burny

A: Yikes, sorry man. Worse than a tattoo?

M: Yes!

M: Though it didn’t last long

M: Like literally 2 minutes

M: Maybe less

A: That’s bearable I guess

M: It will be worth it

M: In my old age my armpits have decided they hate to be shaved and I constantly have razor burn

A: To not have to shave seems like a miracle

M: Doesn’t it

M: Before I actually did it I was thinking about doing my lower legs too

M: But damn that shit hurt and that’s a lot more skin to cover

A: Fred complains about shaving and I’m like, LISTEN.

M: Oh grow a beard Fred

A: RIGHT

A: But your legs should be less sensitive maybe?

M: I asked her and she said it is pretty painful because it takes so much longer. However it really depends on how coarse your hair is and my leg hair is a lot finer and it really only grows on my shins.

A: Fred claims to not have a good beard. Patchy. He threatened a goatee and I was like, SHUT IT DOWN.

M: Nooooo goatee sir

A: Haha

M: My bikini line is pretty coarse but I am still considering it

M: I need like cold packs in my armpits

A: That’s what I would do

***

M: Update - my armpits are almost hairless

A: Oh, I’ve been meaning to ask about that!

M: So apparently it kills the hair the first time but your hair follicles have different cycles so that’s why sessions are 4-6 weeks apart, to get the new growth cycle

M: I have some hairs but it’s greatly reduced

M: Kind of crazy

A: That’s awesome tho

M: Now I’m pretty sure I want to do my legs. Just to the knee, I don’t really have much hair above that

M: Even though it hurts, just NOT SHAVING any more?? Would be pretty awesome

A: Life-changing

A: Think about how much time you’ll save

M: Yeah and never having to think oh I can’t wear that because I need to shave

A: Right! And I didn’t mean to imply that I think it takes you forever to shave your legs I just meant cumulatively

M: Definitely

M: And razors are so stupidly expensive

M: Laser session #2: still hurt like a bitch but maybe slightly less. But didn’t hurt as bad afterwards (the first time I had to ice my pits after 😬)

M: Made appt to do bikini line next time. Working up nerve to do my lower legs 😬😬😬

A: Excitement! Meanwhile, I signed up for some online lady razors club. 🀷🏻‍♀️

M: Haha

M: Fucking shaving I hate it

A: Worst

A: I should look into lasers. Is it permanent?

M: Yup

M: Some people experience a little regrowth but for most people 3 sessions is effective

A: Sweet

M: But man I need to do a shot of tequila or something beforehand

***

M: I have two identical pairs of shorts except they are different sizes and today I accidentally put on the smaller pair and thought I had literally gained 15 pounds overnight

A: Ahhhhhh! God, that would unhinge me.

M: I was like OH MY GOD HOW

A: I’m currently afraid to weigh myself

M: same

M: I am still wearing the tight shorts. Some kind of punishment

M: Also have you SEEN this Loeffler Randall bag that’s basically a leather clutch inside a string grocery bag?


M: I mean I am all for a fancy bag but y’all.

A: Haaaa, oh man. That’s the Emperor’s New Grocery Bag

M: I cackled

A: They’re smoking crack

A: Also, stop wearing those shorts! They’ll break your spirit

M: They are growing on me

M: Probably literally

8 comments:

  1. I hear you on the laser hair removal, but I'm jealous that yours is actually working! I went through that armpit pain four times (or however many) for nothing. The place I went to was called Skin Alive though, so...I should've known better.

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    Replies
    1. Having said that, icing my pit beforehand and taking Ibuprofen did help the pain a little.

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    2. Oh man if I went through the pain and expense and it DIDN'T WORK I would SCREAM.

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  2. I had laser hair removal done in the bikini area 6 years ago. After 6 years, I do have some regrowth but there was definitely "permanent hair reduction" as the technician often told me: "It's not permanent hair REMOVAL, it's permanent hair REDUCTION." Haha. Anyway, it hurt like a bitch. Depending on which technician I had, it could be more bearable as some technicians were more liberal and diligent with applying an icepack before lasering an area.

    Also, that Loeffler Randall bag is ridiculous. What a waste of $300.

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  3. I did my legs and face/chin/neck 6 years ago. Legs? Still pretty amazing. I have to shave maybe once every two weeks and even then I could get away with it because the hair is so patchy. Face though? Garbage, it's all come back. I've heard that if you re-do the lasers you only need a couple of sessions to get rid of everything again, but I've been lazy. And cheap.

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    Replies
    1. This is what I'm afraid of. I want it on my face, but I've heard a lot people say that it's not permanent.

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  4. Bikini hurts like anything but the reduction is worth it (speaking as fair skinned dark haired person). My therapist advised getting a ride to the appt. and having a few glasses of wine beforehand (which I never did).

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  5. Am going on Thursday for chin/neck. Hoping it is not too painful and I can play tennis afterwards and sweat and stuff!

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