Thursday, December 17, 2015

Ye Olde Banana: Things Just Got Weird.



A: This is for YOU.

M: False. Those are actually for no one.

A: But, they combine the modesty of a skirt with the mobility of pants. Don't you want to be modest and mobile, Marianne?

M: If by modest you mean unrecognizable as a female and if by mobile you mean tangled in great swathes of khaki then YES.

A: Which brings us to the other page!


M: I feel like whoever wrote the copy for those pants is maybe hard up.

A: Words words words SENSUAL TREAT. LIBERATES THE HIPS. Whut.

M: SIDE AND REAR.

A: SOUL-COMFORTING REASSURANCE. I am...maybe using pockets wrong?

M: It's a lot of pressure to put on a gee dee pair of khakis, is what I'm saying.

A: They recreate the happy state of nature, Marianne.

M: They are KHAKI PANTS. WITH PLEATS.

A: You know what totally saves it? The suggestion that you should wear two of the kente scarves knotted together as a top.

M: Things just got a little bit sexy.

A: Side-teat is all the rage with the kids today.

M: I'm sorry did you just say TEAT.

M: ADRIEN DONATELLA ARNOLD.

A: YOUR SIDE-TEAT IS FABULOUS!

M: You've been wearing your khakis too much.

A: My hips have been liberated!

M: #TMI

1 comment:

  1. Buy them OVERSIZED (the copy helpfully suggests), and CINCH them with a BELT.

    ReplyDelete