Tuesday, May 10, 2011

Pouty Goth Hotness. (Not really.)

A: A candidate for Hot Hotness?


No?

M: Adrien, I am at the orthodontist and you just made me snort unattractively.

A: Um, but he's wearing a harness.

M: There is no way he has sex without crying.

A: He's so POUTY.

M: I think his lipstick just gave me cancer.

A: Do you think the harness is the Pouty Goth necktie? Kids today.

M: He is trying so hard, Adrien. He just wants you to know his PAIN.

A: The shorts suit is very...Cheap Trick, the facial expression very Twilight. The lipstick very Girl with the Dragon Tattoo. I'm so confused.

M: He is like Alfalfa, grown up and with a child actor complex. Wait. ALFALFA, IS THAT YOU?

A: YOU ARE RIGHT:



M: It's a total cry for help.

A: Should I feel bad for him? Because I really don't. Mostly I just want to clean his face with a linty Kleenex I found in the bottom of my purse.

M: Oh hell no. And I'd like to see you go after him with a little spit shine.

A: Oh yeah, I spat on that Kleenex.

M: I can't end this on Alfalfa:



A: HI THERE. WHO THAT.

M: Damien Lewis, also known as Your New Boyfriend. I got him for you.

A: But...but...your birthday is coming up, not mine! But thank you I'll take him and aren't you THOUGHTFUL.

M: I know, I give and I give.

A: I'm a good taker, I think. Yeah.

M: I REALLY like Damian Lewis and wonder where he has been all my life.

A: Well, you know I like a redhead.

M: I found him by searching "hot redheads"

A: I just snort-laughed.

M: Well, "red-headed men" just got me Carrot Top. I still haven't recovered.

A: Oh, dude.

5 comments:

  1. Adrien! How could you have missed Damian Lewis?! "Band of Brothers"? NBC's "Life"? j/k, I never watched those things either, but my husband has a man-crush on DL and sees practically everything he's in, so I am very aware of him. He does an excellent American accent but is not American. Yum.

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  2. omg, you're convo posts always make me snort and laugh simultaneously. usually in public.

    pure MAGIC the two of you have :)

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  3. M: There is no way he has sex without crying.

    THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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  4. Damian Lewis for hot hotness. all the way. mmmmmmm.

    I saw him once shopping in a department store in London. He was with his lovely wife and carrying his baby. I followed at a discreet distance, dribbling. was that wrong?

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  5. HAHAHAHAHAHAHA, this was hilarious. "M: There is no way he has sex without crying."-dying.

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